Jude and I are still off on our wilderness camping adventure. By now, the kids should be thoroughly filthy, and the moms should have gone through at least one box of Target White Sangria. So I am again presenting you with a...rerun. But it's a good one.
I should throw in that, at his request, I have signed Jude up for Vacation Bible School again this year, so I will be entrusting him to the Presbyterians once more. So clearly, they aren't really as scary as I feared. Or wait.. Maybe we've simply succumbed to their evil plan! WooooHahahahhahahahha (evil Presbyterian laugh).
(For all you Presbyterians out there, the previous sentence was sarcasm.)
Originally posted July 10, 2009, here is...
Camp Mama Week Five: The Presbyterians
A few weeks ago, when I was lamenting the fact that I had no plan for what to do with Jude over his endless summer break, my friend Eileen told me that she had signed her girls up for a fun, inexpensive camp that I still had time to get Jude into. “It’s Vacation Bible School
So this week, Jude was with the Presbyterians. In fact, five of us Catholic moms got together and all sent our kids to VBS, or "Jesus Camp" as Jude calls it. We worked out a brilliant schedule wherein we all took turns with the pick-up and after-camp activities, so each of us got two full days off (mothers really should run the world, everything would be so much more efficient, right?).
Every morning, Jude put on his little “Son Rock Kids Camp” tee shirt and we listened to the CD of Jesus music we were given in the car on the way. Freakily catchy stuff.
Who’s that walking on the water?
Who’s that walking on the sea?
Who’s that walking on the water?
JESUS! He cares for me.
And when he said the “JESUS!” part he’d shoot his little hands up in the air in an enthusiastic gesture. I keep getting all these Jesus songs stuck in my head in a loop. It’s like someone implanted an antenna in my brain and it’s picking up a Christian radio station.
My friend Loretta’s son was walking around the house singing about how much Jesus loves him. Her not-very-religious husband turned to her and asked “What exactly is this camp you’re sending him to?” She looked at him dryly and said “The TWENTY DOLLAR camp”.
I’m keeping my eyes on Jesus,
If I start to fall (clap, clap)
He helps me to stand (clap, clap)
Damn, I’m sorry. I'm telling you, it's an antenna in my brain.
And truly, the camp couldn’t have been better. Really nice people. Lots of activities and crafts. All the kids had as much fun as they would have had at the $400 camp. And it’s not like my kid doesn’t already get a buttload of Jesus talk at Catholic school for God’s sake. But there’s just something about it that makes me…uncomfortable.
Well…maybe it’s that I’m a big fraud because I sent my child there not because I want him to accept Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior, but because it’s TWENTY DOLLARS FOR THE WEEK! But it’s also that we Catholics are just a little uncomfortable with the whole evangelizing, proselytizing thing. We don’t get “saved”. I’m not sure why. I think it’s that we figure we’re just “in”, you know. Cause we get to go to confession and get all cleansed. And we don’t get born again. We were just born. And baptized, and that’s pretty much it. All that born again/amening stuff is just a little too weird for us. We believe in stuff like praying to a bunch of 5th Century saints and we believe we ingest the real, actual body and blood of Jesus every week. But nothing weird or anything.
I know my mother is rolling in her grave. All of my childhood, I battled with being one of the only little Catholic kids in my school. This was the bible belt, baby. All the other kids were Southern Baptist, or Church of Christ
Jude really loved this camp. The other day he said to me “Mama, Bible School
Today was his last day. Water Day. Which Jude was particularly excited about because they got to wear their swimsuits and have a waterslide and lots of big outdoors slippery fun. Hmmm. Water Day. As in…the waters of life. You know, $20 is damn cheap, they were bound to have an ulterior motive. You don’t think they slipped in a baptism, do you?
No, no, no. Jesus is Jesus. It’s all good. And it was TWENTY DOLLARS FOR THE WEEK!
If you believe in your heart
That God raised him from the dead…
You will be saved!