How are you doing this year? I just checked the weather at the North Pole, and The Weather Channel says that it's currently -17 degrees F, but with the windchill it feels like it's -41! So I'm hoping that you and the missus and the elves and the reindeer are inside, with a nice fire going and a hot toddy.
It's been on the coldish side here in Los Angeles, but I realize that our 42 degrees in the morning doesn't have anything on your -17, so I really shouldn't complain. But this cold weather has been giving me a touch of arthritis in my thumbs (I really am turning into my mother), so I worry about you and Mrs. Claus. Maybe this year, when I leave you your treat of cookies and bourbon, I'll also leave you some Icy Hot for your arthritis. All of that sleighing around in the elements and heaving bags of goodies up and down chimneys is bound to do a number on your joints.
But anyway, I believe that I have been a fairly good girl this year. I have really been working on being more patient with Jimmy, and have managed to limit the number of times I slam things around and grumble sarcastically to myself whenever I find some kind of mess or other which he has made and failed to clean up.
I've also been consciously trying to avoid snarky gossip. And sometimes I succeed.
So I have a few things I'd really like to have. If you see fit, maybe you could help a girl out.
You know how I never once ever read the Oprah's Book Club book at the time everybody else did, but instead stubbornly waited a year or so? I attribute this to some strange and rebellious need to do things my own way in my own time. In a similar fashion, I have avoided the whole Ugg boots craze for the last eight years or so. But I have decided that I'm ready. And I think it's something that Jimmy would approve of, given his freakish obsession with keeping everyone's feet warm. I would like either these...
Which do you think? Maybe you could run it by Mrs. Claus.
A new iron.
I realize that this is not a particularly sexy gift, but I could really use one. I dropped my old iron about a year ago, and the pointy tip cracked off. It still works fine, but the jagged end keep getting stuck on the clothes. I probably should have bought a new one right away, but some part of my mother which lives deep inside me just refuses to throw something away that still works perfectly well.
And by the same token...
A new toaster oven.
The old toaster oven still works just fine, but unfortunately, the handle has fallen off. So in order to open and close it, I have to stick a knife into it and pry it open, then hold it open with a pot holder. Maybe not the most convenient or safest way to do things.
You know how much I love Birchbox (you know because you know everything). Getting my little box of treats every month is a great source of joy for me. Well, they have this cool Birchbox points system where you earn points every time you buy something from them or review a product or refer a friend. It's the Refer a Friend part where you get the big points. Well, I've been saving up points to buy Jimmy some cologne for Christmas. He really loves this cologne, and it's ridiculously expensive. But if I had more Birchbox points, I could get it for cheap. So maybe, if Mrs. Claus or some of the elves would like to join Birchbox, they could use this link - http://birch.ly/1duYMlz - and then I can get the Refer a Friend points? I promise they will enjoy their Birchboxes. Would you mind passing that on to them? Jimmy really wants to smell good.
No shoulder surgery.
There's something wrong with my right shoulder. I don't know what. But I can no longer rotate it in the way it needs to be rotated, and if I move it in one direction very suddenly, it feels as though a large, hot knife is being plunged directly into my shoulder blade. I realize that I need to go to the doctor, but honestly, I'm afraid that the doctor is going to say that I need to at least immobilize it for a while, and at the most have some kind of dreadful surgery, and I just simply don't have the time. I have too much to do. Perhaps I'm being paranoid. It might just be bursitis or something. Anyway, any help you have on this subject would be appreciated.
Health for the old ones.
I'm worried about my dear in-laws, Mommy, Pop and Aunt Grace. They are all in their 80s now, and their health is declining. Nothing major, just many, many small problems. It's really the first time that it's become apparent that they are all getting old. They've always been so youthful and strong. But now they are getting kind of feeble and frightened. Pop has suddenly started saying "I love you" when we finish phone conversations, and I fear that he thinks he's going to die. And Mommy's had a slew of ailments, some kind of serious and scary. I would really appreciate any help in keeping them safe and well for a while longer. We all love them dearly.
Okay, I guess that's it for this year. As always, if this is too much work, I'd also accept cash or gift cards.
Thank you so much for always being so generous for my boy, Jude. He's still a firm believer, by the way. And let me know if there's anything I can do for you. If you need me to take care of some of the stuff for Jude, just let me know.
Hope you have a safe and rewarding flight! Love to Mrs. Claus, the elves and the reindeer!
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